A VALENTINE FOR BOB
I keep telling myself “I am ready” – that when the day comes all will be well. A full life lived, so on and so forth…. Then I take it all back and beg some kind of God to give me just a few more hours with you.
I smell the musty, familiar scent of your aged fur and your stale treat-scented breath. The peanut butter from your morning handful of pills just so you can make it through the day’s events in comfort. I just hope you know how much I love you.
I wander around in my filled-up heart and see every single moment we have spent together. Our hikes, our nap time, our running the beaches up and down the coast. Airports and cars, trains and buses…. The steaks, the cheeseburgers, and even those days when we had no place to call home. Every single moment I have had with you is gold to me.
I always think I am ready, but today – just for today – I won’t dare let you go. I don’t think I will ever be really ready, my old, old sweet Bob.
My greatest gift in life has been you.
– David Wichman
A VALENTINE FOR BEAR
When your dad and I were newlyweds, we rescued you as a puppy. It was love at first sight! My heart melted as I cuddled with you for the first time.
You grew into a 92-pound Lab/Boxer mix that still hasn’t come to terms with your size. I grin and try to hide my giggles as you slowly maneuver your giant body into my lap between the laptop and myself.
No matter what kind of day I’m having, I can count on you to do something silly and put a smile on my face – just one of the reasons I love you!
You have been my steadfast companion through my battle with Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. You snuggle and comfort me during the difficult times and never leave my side after treatments or procedures. You’re my walking partner, support, and best friend, wrapped up in a giant furry body. You give me so much more than I could ever give back.
I love you, my Bear!
– Noelle Chelli Lopez
Live, Love, Laugh: Lessons from My Dog
Oliver. He makes me laugh. It’s extraordinary. Delightful. This creature with four paws, floppy ears, and a wonderful flag tail uplifts my heart. He brings to life a sense of curiosity and enlivens the moments that would be otherwise mundane.
He makes me laugh. It seems to be a sacred duty, to love me so much that he wants me to always be light, be joyful. He doesn’t do it because he is trying to do it. He does it because he so authentically, fully his own little being.
He wiggles into the twilight of my own sleep as his tongue smacks and he snuffles awake, then checks to see if I am stirring. He politely sniffs louder and louder to wake me fully so that he can go outside.
On our walks at Point Isabel, he never loses interest in old ground because for his hypersensitive nose there is fresh excitement to take in. I am amazed by how he can stay with a certain stink until all the details are gathered then circle to a perfect position to lift his leg. His “I am here!”
There is so much to learn by watching him sojourn through the park. For example, how can he greet the same people over and over, and still be beyond thrilled by them every time? How can he meet new people and accept their clumsy petting with such tender patience?
All of it makes me laugh. How could it not? The ease and grace and fun! He loves the adventure of every day. And then there is the pleasure of coming home after mind-boggling work and stand-still traffic to his genuine greeting of complete canine joy answering the door.
Oliver, my darling dog – his little nose always sniffing out the good things of life, his big black eyes looking to me for acceptance and approval. Because of him my heart is repurposed.
The vow I make this Valentine’s season is to honor more than ever the gift of him in my life. I pledge to follow his lead. To laugh and offer myself as a conduit of laughter for others. To love so much that I would do anything to make my beloved happy. To find who I am authentically and live that. To respectfully make my needs known so that I can have them met with patience and love. To see all things in an original light, experiencing them as they are, new each day, and not get stuck in the memory of what they were yesterday.
To step into the mystery of life, orbit the spot, then leave my mark, my “I am.” To enter my life with a spirit of exploration and discovery. To meet friends with excitement about who they are, where they have been, and what of the world they bring with them into my life. To greet strangers with compassion and the absence of judgment. To wake up in the fresh morning and breathe it in because it holds all promise. And to, even at the tired end of the afternoon, extend love to all who come to my door.
Here is my Valentine message to Oliver, my marvelous companion, who makes me laugh and teaches me so much:
Dear Oliver,
Thank you, little dog, for choosing me. Thank you for coming into my life and modeling your wisdom for me. Thank you for your patience as I learned how to be a good human. Thank you for learning my language and teaching me yours. Thank you for being flexible and independent. Thank you for your “never give up” and for your “always hopeful” – and for looking at me every day as if I am a spectacular being of endless joy.
Sometimes I think my heart can’t contain the love I feel for you. I never knew I could love so much. You have redefined the depth and meaning of loving, and everyone in my life benefits from it, even if they don’t know it actually comes from you.
A part of my conscious waking, and sometimes dreaming, life is always concentrated on you. Where are you? How are you? Can’t wait to get home to you! It is a secret joy that lives inside me no matter how many miles or how few steps are separating us. Your sweetness; your goofy little whirl and toss of body as you throw a rawhide bone across the room; your sideways tilting of the head as you work so diligently to understand what I am saying; your tail thumping my chair as you dream; your excited pawing the earth in anticipation – all these things make my world turn.
You saved my life. You opened me up. You are a blessing to so many, but most of all to me. Thank you, my little man, for trusting me with your love.
I love you so very much! Always yours, truly.
Rosana Schutte sings with a Bay Area trio, Anjali (anjali3.com), and is writing her Ph.D in mythology (mythiceyeview.com). She and Oliver have been celebrating life together for 10 years. They live in the East Bay and are in high demand as house/dog sitters. Contact them at Ro.Oliver.sit4u@gmail.com for more information.
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