There is a school of thought, especially among those who kiss the rings of the priests of “rational” science, that when we say our dogs love us we are anthropomorphizing – that is, projecting human feelings onto creatures that are essentially furry robots.
To such people, what appears to be love expressed by our pooches is more accurately an intricate series of responses calculated to increase the likelihood of gaining sustenance and protection from the pack (in this case, you and your family). Darwin uber alles. To my mind, this is all ideology obscuring simple observation. If you can’t feel the genuine affection of a dog, then maybe you’re the furry robot.
I’m more interested in a different question: Do dogs project their ways of thinking onto us? Do they assume we go to street festivals because there are more butts to sniff there? Do they imagine that we go to movies, where they are not allowed, solely to scarf down popcorn and pizza slices free from their wistful eyes and drooling muzzles? Do they believe we go walking in Armstrong Woods not for the peace and beauty but because all those trees would inspire any creature who exalted in the poetic language of “tag-a-log?”
I doubt dogs think like that. I suspect they simply accept the fact that there are things in this world they don’t understand. And they are comfortable with this state of affairs. They may wonder, in their fashion, why mom and dad go to the movies without them, but they don’t obsess about it. They probably just dismiss the issue with some version of, “Don’t know, yet another phenomenon beyond my ken, no problem.”
Which calls to mind a Buddhist prescription for happiness. (Dogs are so Zen.) Free your brain from bogus explanations and just be with what is. This is verboten in the “they’re just furry robots” crowd, of course. Those folks seem to have a mortal dread of the unknown and need an explanation for everything.
I suggest, as do my furry friends, as does songwriter Iris Dement, that we all just need to “let the mystery be.”
My sister Claire has on occasion been an Ace Ventura in reverse. Instead of finding missing pets, she inadvertently helps pets go missing. As you might imagine, this has not been the most rewarding preoccupation of her life.
Claire runs a cleaning service and once when she was on a job she saw a big German Shepherd standing in the middle of the street in the pouring rain. “Poor thing must be lost,” she thought, and called the dog over. His tag said his name was Pablo and provided a phone number, nothing else. She called the number; no response. So she put the dog in the back of her station wagon and drove off to her next job. (Now she knows why wet German Shepherds with muddy paws are a godsend for car detailers.)
The rain soon stopped, and Pablo was very happy to find that Claire’s next client had a big Rottweiler to play with in the backyard. The two dogs romped it up while Claire worked. She phoned Pablo’s number again a couple of hours later, and this time the owner answered. Turns out the dog had been standing right in front of his own house when she rescued him. This little adventure worked out pretty well for Pablo. He had an impromptu play date, with lunch thrown in. Claire’s reward: one smelly car.
Another time, Claire was driving along and saw a stray Pit Bull wearing no tags, looking forlorn and confused on a residential sidewalk. She put the dog in her car, drove home to get a leash and collar for him (she is also in demand as a petsitter), drove back and stood on the corner where she had found him hoping someone would show up to claim him. Soon a woman came storming out of a nearby house, roaring, “Hey, whatcha doin’, lady?! That’s my dog you’ve got your leash on!” How easily heroic dog rescuer becomes evil dognapper.
My kind-hearted sister has learned her lesson and is retired from the pet detective biz. The moral of the story for dog owners: Make sure your dog wears a tag that includes your phone number AND address. This is the best way to avoid getting Bowser rescued off your front lawn.
Herb Canine is one of writer/musician Tad Toomay’s many alter egos. Get acquainted with the others at www.tadtoomay.com.
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